Let me ask you...

Have you ever felt so deeply connected with your man … his arms around you, feeling warm and happy and giggly and safe and utterly RIGHT… 

Only to feel that WALL come down between you?

Almost out of nowhere. 

Almost without warning.

And you feel that sickening clench in your stomach as you realize…

He’s pulling away. 

And you don’t know why … or how to FIX it. 

If you’ve ever experienced anything like this for yourself… then you need to read this article, and watch the short cartoon put together for you at the end, RIGHT NOW…[LINK HERE] 

Because whether YOUR man is ‘checking out’ of the relationship emotionally or not… 

You NEED to know what to do when the man you love pulls away from you BEFORE it happens…

…Why?

Because trying to learn how to DRAG his love back to you when you’re already losing him is like trying to learn how to swim when you’re already drowning.

Look: I learned this myself, the hard way. 

It cost me relationship after relationship, heartbreak after heartbreak. 

And after years of seeing the men I loved walk out of my life, leaving me desperate and sobbing and bloody and broken…

…I finally got smart and decided to take back control of my lovelife. 

That’s why I made it my life’s work to uncover the secret psychology of men…

And the incredible hidden NEEDS that your man has… that all men have (but that he will never, EVER reveal to you on his own)…

And I want to share 3 of those secret, POWERFUL needs with you right now. 

So if you want to prevent any man from EVER pulling away from you again… and DRAG his desire and devotion 100% back to YOU (where it belongs), forever…

Then there are just THREE things you need to know:

1. Thing One: Understand that all men periodically NEED to pull away from ANY relationship … in exactly the same way YOU need to stop eating dinner when you’re stuffed to bursting. 

Weird but true: 

To a man, love is like food. 

Like such good food. 

But even with the BEST food in the world… even if he’s been STARVING for years…

He’s still going to get full eventually.

I’m paraphrasing from Dr John Gray here, of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus (and by the way, if you haven’t already read it, you should)…

But basically, a guy’s heart can only hold so much emotional ‘food’ before he needs time to leave the table and digest. 

In other words, him ‘pulling away’ is a normal and NATURAL part of the desire cycle.

He “eats”… he gets “full”… then he leaves the table for awhile so that he can get “hungry” again.

In other words, ALL MEN periodically NEED to ‘leave the table’. Otherwise, he’ll never feel that desperate craving to get close you to again.

Which is why having a man periodically pull back from you can actually be an incredibly good thing.

Because IF you handle it right (and I’m about to tell you how), when a man pulls away, it’s a GOLDEN opportunity to snap his attention, love, and desire right back onto you again… and closer than ever before.

Here’s how to do it. 

 

2. Thing Two: When a man pulls away, you must make an IMMEDIATE commitment to yourself to react in a way that most women DON’T, WON’T, OR CAN’T.

Here, I’ll paint you a little picture. 

Let’s say you’ve noticed a distance in your man’s behavior lately. 

Maybe his cute little texts are getting fewer and further between. 

Maybe he’s acting quiet, and distant, and cold, and weird. 

Or maybe he’s even told you outright that it’s not working and he ‘needs some space’. 

So, what should you DO?

Well, first I’ll tell you what you SHOULDN’T do (which is exactly what 99% of women end up doing):

Freaking out.

Most women react to a man going distant by PANICKING and saying things like:

• ‘What’s wrong?’ 
• ‘Is it me?’ 
• ‘Did I do something wrong?’ 
• ‘Is everything okay?’ 
• ‘You seem distant…’

But if you panic, freak out, or get ‘clingy’, you will QUICKLY drive him further away than ever.

And here’s why…

When it comes to love, a man’s capacity to feel love and desire for you is INCREDIBLY dependent on just TWO things:

 - His ability to make you happy, and …

- His ability to feel your TRUST in him.

 When a man perceives that he’s making you happy and that you TRUST him, his brain is flooded in a warm wash of happy chemicals.

He feels pride, ecstasy, euphoria, and a potent surge of sheer masculinity.

In other words, making you happy and earning your trust makes him feel like a MAN.

Don’t forget, most men walk around in their lives in a haze of insecurity, anxiety, and worries of being disrespected.

That’s why it’s so incredibly powerful when he feels your trust and respect in him.

It makes him stand up straight, feel ecstatic and warm and proud and strong, and ready to fight dragons for you just to feel it again.

But, if you freak out and react by trying to grab him and DRAG him back to you…

…then he (rightly) perceives that he’s NOT making you happy and you’re NOT trusting him.

Which triggers an instant and devastating surge of UNHAPPY chemicals in his brain.

The result?

Deep in his unconscious brain, he forges an unbreakable chemical link between ‘being around you’ with the unpleasant and deeply repulsive feeling of ‘being disrespected and distrusted as a man’.

And that’s when what WAS a simple, healthy, natural male instinct to ‘pull away’ in order to come CLOSER…
… ow becomes a legitimate WALL between the two of you.

So how do you make sure this NEVER happens to you?

Read on…

 

3. Thing Three: When a man pulls away, you need to EMBRACE it as the golden opportunity for a deeper, more incredible connection it really is.

If you feel like he’s pulling away (and he might very well be), here’s what you absolutely need to do:

- You MUST relax.

- You MUST NOT stress.

- You MUST remind yourself that all men do this, that it’s natural and healthy, that it’s literally FUELLING his ability to come closer to you…

- And most of all, you must allow him to pull back without freaking out and without trying to ‘fix’ it.

Because most of the time, there’s nothing TO fix.

It’s simply a man being a man … and getting closer to you in the only way he knows how:

By instinctively creating the DISTANCE between you that ends up driving a deeper, more connected CLOSENESS when he comes back your way again.

“But Mirabelle … I can’t just do nothing! How can you be so heartless??”

Ha.

Well, first of all, understand that I’m NOT telling you to do nothing.

What I’m saying is that you must relax.

And relaxing is not ‘nothing’!

Real relaxing means taking positive action to become a stronger, more awesome version of yourself.

Whether that’s reading a novel, seeing a friend, taking a walk, playing with your puppy, cooking a meal, working out…

…anything you do that truly relaxes you is taking positive action to build a better life, a healthier body, a stronger immune system…

… and probably also stronger friendships, better self esteem, and a happier, more balanced mind.

So, relaxing is NOT nothing : )

But … hey, I get it. ‘Relaxing’ can feel downright IMPOSSIBLE when you feel like the man you love is slipping through your fingers and checking out of the relationship emotionally.

Plus, there’s the bitter truth: sometimes, a man pulling away really does spell trouble for your relationship.

But Here’s The Good News:

Right Now, Here’s Something AMAZING That’s Going To Bring All His Barriers Crumbling Down Forever, And Drag His Desire And Devotion 100% Back To You The SECOND You Use It.

Here’s the deal:

You know how I mentioned at the start of this article that there’s a cartoon I put together for you?

Well, I want you to go and watch that cartoon right now.

And here’s why:

Because, in this tooth-grittingly personal video, I tell you a raw, honest, and devastating story of how one woman came this close to driving her man away forever …

PLUS I’ll give you the EXACT eight steps I found that STOP a man from pulling away dead in his tracks …

Make him ‘hungry’ for your love … 

And honestly create a level of lasting bliss and deep emotional CONNECTION between you and your man that no-one and nothing can destroy.

And If you want him to not just ‘love’ but absolutely devote himself to you heart and soul …
Then click here [LINK HERE] to learn the eight simple steps that give you push-button access to his deepest thoughts and feelings, and turn him into a ‘lifelong monogamy junkie’ forever.

This article comes to you courtesy of Mirabelle Summers, author of Wrap Him Around Your Finger [LINK HERE] 

If you are serious about changing your success with men, and getting men to do more of the things you WANT him to do...

If you want genuine men who will love you, shower you with attention, and give you the commitment you
deserve...

Discover Mirabelle's secret mind control method and watch some pretty amazing things happen :)

Do it now:

Wrap Him Around Your Finger [LINK HERE] 

Today I want to answer an important question and talk about SEX.

Here’s a question from Nora …

Hi Mirabelle,

I have a question about sex.

I love sex. I LOVE it. But recently it’s gotten boring … and I miss the craziness and the passion and the feeling of being wanted.

I miss it a lot.

How do I bring it back?

Am I being stupid or naïve to hope that my boyfriend and I can have an amazing passionate sex lifethat doesn’t die away over time?

Or should I just buy a vibrator and relegate awesome sex to the past forever??

- Nora

Hi Nora,

Thanks for your question.

I have to admit, I chose this question because I read it and winced.

As someone who frankly NEEDS regular, hot sex to feel in any way normal and truly alive, I read your question and just KNEW I had to tackle it right freaking now.

Because hey … I can relate to your problem.

(And I’ll prove it by telling you an extremely personal and somewhat embarrassing story about my own sex life just a few paragraphs down.)

First though, I’ve gotta admit …

Um, you haven’t really given me much to work with here.

(I mean … how old are you? How old is he? How long have you been together? Do you live together? What’s the story here??)

But hey, you’re only human. And maybe your terrible sexual frustration blinded you to the need for pertinent details ;)

So, I’ll do the best I can with what I’ve got …

Which means it’s time for my embarrassing and DEEPLY personal sex story.

It’s hard for me to even ADMIT this, seeing as I’m a professional relationships coach (and an Amazon.com #1 bestselling author to boot …)

But, something most people don’t know about me?

I used to be the QUEEN of boring sex.

In ALL of my committed relationships.

Every single relationship I had?

We’d start off crazy and intense and hyper-sexualized.

We couldn’t wait to RIP each other’s clothes off and have crazy wild gorilla sex in every room of the house.

… And sometimes outside in the garden.

… And sometimes in the bathroom at dinner parties.

… And sometimes …

… well, you get the idea.

But as the months (and eventually YEARS) passed …

The sex that used to be scorching hot …

… somehow turned into ‘comfort sex’.

Sex that was the physical equivalent of a pair of slippers.

Sex that was comfy and warm and familiar …

… and BORING.

Sex that you wouldn’t want to wear with a hot dress.

Sex that you would NEVER wear out on a hot date.

(Ummmm … is it just me, or is this analogy getting super weird? ;)

So here’s what I’d do:

Before I figured this ‘sex business’ out …

Before I discovered something that actually works to respark that devilish gleam in his eye …

… to pull his attention AWAY from his work, his phone, his videogames, his money worries, his poker buddies, his LIFE …

… and fix it 100% onto ME like wallpaper onto a wall …

… to get him chasing me around the kitchen and TEARING my shirt off my shoulders …

… Something that’ll get your blood boiling, and have him literally plucking at the crotch of his pants and shifting in his seat and get that sexy growl rumbling in his voice …

… something that has BOTH your brains bubbling over with lust and your hearts racing overtime out of your chests …

… and both of you sending naughty, dirty, tender sweet and sexy EVIL little texts to each other all day long (when you really should be working, you naughty minx …)

Before all of that …

I’d just do what everyone else did:

Enjoy the sex with the latest ‘someone new’ while it lasted …

And drink down the sweet, sweet novelty like I’d been trekking through a dry, barren desert and had somehow stumbled on an oasis.

I’d drink frantically – deeply – thirstily - from that sweet, delightful new oasis until I couldn’t drink any more.

And then three months would go by.

Or two.

Or six.

Or twelve.

And then the oasis would start to run dry.

Those intoxicating feelings would go away.

We’d stop talking about fantasies, and naughty day dreams, and planning how to ravish each other’s minds and bodies as soon as we got home …

… and our communication would veer AWAY from sex, AWAY from lust, AWAY from fun,and become …

‘Can you pick up some milk on the way home?’

‘Remember we’ve got that dinner party on Friday, so you need to be home by six.’

‘Are you going to clean the dishes any time soon?’

Like a bottle of overshaken Coke, the sex would go flat, and boring, and tepid …

… and it wouldn’t QUENCH me any more.

And then we’d eventually break up … I’d find someone new … and the whole cycle would start all over again.

Oh, in case you’re wondering?

Yes, this went on for YEARS.

Yes, I realize how immature that sounds.

Yes, I know it’s humiliating to be a dating coach and admit this kind of thing about my past.

But I’m being transparent here for a reason …

… because I think my humiliating past mistakes might just help YOU avoid the samehorrible sex life I endured for so long.

Because, just a few years back, something crazy happened.

I met this weird old guy.

This weird, balding, kinda … stinky … old guy who called himself a ‘mentalist’.

And during the course of our (frankly, insane sounding conversation – I’ll tell you about it sometime) …

… this so-called mentalist gave me a specific sequence of EIGHT WORDS.

Eight simple, innocent words that (this ‘mentalist’ guy said) would drive any man literallywild with desire.

Just eight seemingly ‘magical’ words that (he said) would literally give me the power to turn a guy’s heart to putty …

Wrap his desire for me around my finger like bubble gum …

… and have him not just wanting, not just needing, but literally CRAVING to stalk me round the bedroom like a growling, oversexed, starving alpha-male lion eyeing up a slab of juicy home-cured bacon. 

Now, look:

I had my doubts.

(I mean, I’m an INCREDIBLY skeptical person. I admit it freely. And here was some random old dude who worked out of his car, whispering about ‘magic words’ in my ear with stinky coffee-breath?? Please.)

But then I went home …

… and I looked at my life …

… and I realized that I was tired of just ‘managing’ to hang onto a relationship.

I was sick of eking my way through love.

For once, I wanted to go for my ALIVENESS, and try for something magical, instead of staying stuck in my ‘comfort zone’.

 (Which by that stage was already pretty dry and barren … yup, my latest oasis was starting to run dry.)

I mean, what did I have to lose?

So that night, I whispered the eight words in my guy’s ear.

And what happened next?

Well … I won’t go into any details, but …

…  mmmmmmmmmmm : )

It was dirty, and amazing, and passionate, and wonderful …

… and quite frankly freaking incredible.

I went to sleep that night (or maybe it was early that morning) aching and sore and sweaty and smiling  …

… and feeling truly seen, truly wanted, truly DESIRED for the first time in YEARS.

I felt ALIVE again.

I felt POWERFUL again.

I felt like a woman again.

And best of all, I hadn’t had to end my relationship or find someone ‘new’ to feel thoseamazing feelings again.

Instead, I was feeling them with MY GUY.

And (here’s the best part) …

I could see those feelings for ME written all over HIS face, too.

Shining right out of his heart when he touched me.

Spilling from his eyes like sunlight when he looked at me.

And I could hear the desire and appreciation and WONDER vibrating in his voice when he whispered (and moaned, and bellowed) in my ear.

It was so powerful I nearly cried.

So, enough about me … what about YOU?

What can YOU actually DO to bring that terrifying, amazing gleam of lust and desire and PASSION back in your guy’s eye, when he looks at you?

(No matter how many kids you’ve got, how insanely demanding your job is, how little PRIVACY you have, or how tired and stressed out you feel at the end of the day??)

Well, the TRUTH is …

… sex in a committed relationship tends to go stale and stagnant for ONE reason and ONE reason only …

(And brace yourself, because you might not like what I’m about to say …)

Sex goes stale because you might actually be TOO close to each other.

Yup.

You know all that advice in relationship columns about ‘closeness creating great sex’?

And ‘telling each other EVERYTHING’?

And ‘if you’re not satisfied, you should ‘open up’ and be more transparent with your partner’??

Yes?

Sound familiar?

Well, it’s all a LIE.

The hard-won, closely-held, and ACTUAL truth is, sex goes downhill for a VERY simple reason …

… you guys might actually be TOO CLOSE to truly want each other any more.

I know that sounds crazy, so here’s what I mean.

1. “Love” is about being close and connected, right?

1. But “desire” is about wanting something (or someone) to come closer, yes?

So when you are SO CLOSE that you’re almost the same person …

… there’s no room LEFT to actually desire each other.

Because you’ve already GOT each other.

There’s no space left to crave more.

It’s like pouring more water into an already-overflowing glass: there’s just nowhere for it to go.

(By the way, if you want to know the science behind this incredible fact, you should pick up a copy of Mating In Captivity, by a total warrior of a woman called Esther Perel. She’s a true pioneer in this field, and I think you’ll really like her.)

Now, I’ll admit something here …

The reason why sex is SO HOT for new lovers is, yes, partially the novelty.

 (I’m not going to lie to you; sex with a new lover is always going to be super-intense, and there’s no sense denying it. Novelty is a HUGE aphrodisiac for most folks.)

But what if there was ANOTHER reason that made great sex great – at ANY stage?

A BIGGER and BETTER reason than anything else?

Something that you could actually USE, and take ADVANTAGE of, to bring back theanimal in your man?

Something that will make him smile, and shiver, and sweat …

… and have him openly, unapologetically craving your body and your sex and your LOVElike it was the early days all over again?

No matter how long you’ve been together or how depressingly ‘routine’ your sex life is these days?

Because, as it should so happen …

… there IS.

And that brings me to my next important point, which is …

How Nature screwed men over (and why the future of your sex life hinges on this one simple fact)

Fact:men have kind of been played a cruel TRICK on by nature …

… because as a guy, his happiness in a relationship (and his SEXUAL DESIRE for you) is tied directly to yours.

Here’s why:

Because men are biologically hardwired to feel the most desire, lust, happiness, and pleasure when YOU are feeling (genuine, unfaked) desire, lust, happiness, and pleasure with HIM.

A lot of women don’t know this …

… but when a guy feels he’s ‘doing you proud’, it sets off an EXPLOSION of ‘happy chemicals’ in his brain and body …

… which basically add up to him feeling powerful, masculine, sexy, proud, MANLY, and primed to find YOU sexy and desirable as hell.

But, if he’s NOT pleasing you (or even if he just FEELS like he’s not …)

… then that means he’s going to be pretty unhappy …

… have doubts about himself …

… stop feeling good when you’re around …

… stop feeling able to be vulnerable and open and sexually alive around you …

… and generally feel like kind of a FAILURE AS A MAN.

And whatever sexual spark remained between you gets snuffed out like a wet match.

Because men are biologically driven to FEEL like MEN.

His sexual desire for you literally HINGES on it.

Which brings me to my next (and final) point:

So if he needs YOU to want HIM to be able to want YOU …

… but you’re just not feeling it (and no, you’re not allowed to fake it) …

… then what the heck do you do now??

So what’s the next step?

Should you “have an awkward honest talk” about the relationship?

(Ugh.)

Should you spell out your needs and hopes for your sex life??

(Ughhhh.)

Should you get him to pop a ‘little blue pill’?

Should you watch porn together?

Buy some naughty toys?

Think about investing in a stripper’s pole for your bedroom??

Um … no. 

(Although the last 3 suggestions could be kind of fun. Heh.)

In fact, here’s why all those suggestions won’t work for you right now:

1. Because you don’t want help with the MECHANICS of great sex.

1. You want to feel the desire behind great sex.

So what should you do?

Here’s what:

FIRST of all,  just like Virginia Woolf said, you need to create an emotional, mental, and psychological ‘room of your own’.

Here’s the deal:

Personally, I’m a huge fan of individuality.

In my relationships with men, I actually keep a lot of my life ‘my own’ and the thought of sharing EVERYTHING with someone frankly terrifies me.

(Also, just saying, but … sometimes, telling a guy ‘everything’ can be kind of a dick move. Why? Because it’s actually GOOD to have some emotional privacy in a relationship.)

Yup: in many cases, keeping ‘secrets’ from him literally keep things happy, healthy, and HOTTER THAN EVER.

And here’s why:

Because of the laws of PHYSICS, people.

There’s a law in quantum physics called the Pauli Exclusion Principle, and it states:

 ‘Two objects cannot occupy the same space at the same time.”

That means when you come close enough, you aren’t really two individual people any more …

… you’ve done the Vulcan mind-meld and you’ve actually, freakily, kind of become the SAME PERSON.

And that’s DEATH to your sex life, because (as you now know) you cannot WANT something if you’ve already GOT it.

So, can you have too much love for great sex?

Well, maybe not LOVE.

But ‘closeness’?

Hell yes you can.

So here’s what to DO about it:

1. You take a little step back
2. You reclaim your INDIVIDUALITY a tad bit
   And (this next bit’s important) …
3. With ZERO stress and ZERO guilt, you allow some secrets and distance and STRENGTH to shine inside your heart again.

 

You become YOU again.

You know.

Your own person.

With your own power.

And your own secrets, space, and SEXUALITY.

So how the heck do you do THAT, without pushing him away or actually making things WORSE??

Well … I’m glad you asked : )

And my answer to your question comes in the form of one more question for YOU:

Would you like to be able to take control of his DESIRE for you, simply by whispering eight tiny little words in his ear?

Do you ever wish he would look at you as a WOMAN again?

Pursue you?

Chase you round the bedroom?

Touch you more, hug you more, smile at you more?

Send you sweet, tender, dirty little texts on a daily basis?

Lust after your body, your heart, and your affection …

… and not just ‘show’ you but actually TELL you how much he wants and craves you, ten or twenty or even fifty times a day, every single day for the rest of your lives together?

If so, then you should go check out this cartoon I put together for you

>> The secret method that makes him WORSHIP you [YOUR LINK GOES HERE

In it, I’ll give you the 8 simple words that will inspire a level of lust, desire, and tender, connected, unapologetic PASSION in any man …

… and have him telling you with shock, awe, and delight that you are the one woman who can destroy the thought of other women for him, stoke his ego, make him feel like a MAN, and keep him sexually and emotionally entranced with YOU …

… for LIFE.

Trust me: you’re going to like these words : )

(Oh, btw, you’ll also discover the super-odd-sounding story of how I went bald a few years ago …

… and how doing so actually helped me get the love and lust and connection I wasyearning for.)

Enjoy :)

This article comes to you courtesy of Mirabelle Summers, author of Wrap Him Around Your Finger [LINK HERE] 

If you are serious about changing your success with men, and getting men to do more of the things you WANT him to do...

If you want genuine men who will love you, shower you with attention, and give you the commitment you
deserve...

Discover Mirabelle's secret mind control method and watch some pretty amazing things happen :)

Do it now:

Wrap Him Around Your Finger [LINK HERE] 

Recently, I answered the following question from a reader …

‘Hi Mirabelle,

I’ve been with my husband for six years and I just found out he’s been having an affair.

‘I’m heartbroken and I can’t figure out why he would need to cheat when he had a real live woman at home who loves him. He says he can’t explain it himself and doesn’t expect me to forgive him.

To give perspective, I think I’ve been a great wife: I’m hot, I’m youngish (38), I take care of my man in the bedroom … and plus I’ve seen the woman he cheated with and she’s really nothing special. She has wrinkles and she’s kind of pudgy.

I’m heartbroken and all I want right now is an explanation. I could understand if it was with a supermodel or something, but her?

Please help.’ 
- Sara

---

Hi, Sara,

Thanks for your question.

Actually, thanks for your questions, because reading between the lines here you’ve got a lot going on that you’re want answers for.

So let’s break it down one question at a time (and in no particular order, because my brain works in weird ways like that.)

Here are the questions I see in your letter, and the answers to those questions:

1. Why the hell do men cheat in the first place??

Okay, first things first: you know that idea that ‘men cheat because they’re evolutionarily wired to spread their seed’?

Yeah?

Well, it’s nonsense.

(For a start, the numbers are in, and we women actually cheat just as much as men do, and we don’t have penises or balls full of sperm screaming to be let out into the gene pool at large.)

So … it’s NOT NOT NOT just about the sex.

In fact, for reasons I’ll go into in a sec, sex is only a teensy tiny (but very sweet) slice of the pie.

The truth is, men cheat for the same exact reasons women do – and the biggest reason of all is EMOTIONAL DISCONNECTION.

In no particular order, the most common reasons for cheating include…

.

- Because he’s unhappy at home
- Because he wants to break up but don’t have the balls to do it so he’s going to make YOU do it
- Because he’s bored
- Because he thinks he won’t get caught
- Sometimes (rarely, but it does happen) because he genuinely meets someone special and falls in love and it feels like turning your back on life to refuse something that could be super special.
- Oh, and because maybe you’re not having sex with him any more – or maybe when you do, it feels forced and disconnected and unloving and lonely and weird.

So yeah, sex is usually a part of it – I’m not going to be the one to try and tell you that if a man is getting ZERO sex at home, that he’s going to be able to turn it down indefinitely …

… but is it the main reason?

Hell no.

What it really comes down to is, assuming your man is basically a good person and not a garbage human, emotional dissatisfaction and disconnection.

And even though he’s a guy, he feels those things in just the same way that you do.

In other words – assuming that your man is basically a good person – he probably cheated because he feels lonely and sad and unappreciated and undesired.

Now, I don’t know much about your exact situation (your letter was kind of light on the details) but I can pick up a few things just from what you’ve said.

And one of them is (this is going to sting a little bit …)

2. Um, you sound kind of self-righteous and arrogant.

Yup, the gloves are coming off now, and I’m going to tell you the truth: I know you’re heartbroken and I know you’re sad and confused and hurting …

… but you also sound kind of …

… well, BRAGGY.

All that stuff about ‘taking care of your man in the bedroom’ and laughing at the other woman because she’s ‘pudgy’ …

… it just doesn’t paint a great picture. It’s kind of contemptuous (I’ll get back to this theme in a sec, because it’s important) …

… and also it’s kind of patronizing. The idea that your man would be justified in cheating on you as long as it was with someone really ‘hot’ – it just doesn’t say a lot of great stuff about the way you see your man.

Almost as though he’s someone who thinks and feels with his dick instead of his actual brain and heart.

(And I can tell you right now – although a man’s penis is VERY important to his sense of self, I can’t think of a single man who would be flattered by the idea that he’s not capable of making decisions using his big brain instead of his little one.)

Now, I’m going to cut you some slack because, yeah, your man just cheated on you.

And I know exactly how awful that is, because I’ve been there myself and it sucked.

But at the same time, that feeling of CONTEMPT that I detect in your email is actually a huge, huge, and crazily common factor in an otherwise-great man deciding to take the plunge and cheat on his wife or girlfriend.

Which brings me to …

3. Contempt, crud, and the burden of unmet expectations

Fact: men have kind of been played a cruel trick on by nature …

… because as men, their happiness is tied directly to yours.

To understand what I mean, you have to know something VERY simple about men:

Men are hardwired to feel the most pleasure when YOU are feeling pleasure.

A lot of women don’t know this, but most men feel HUGE surges of pride, self esteem, triumph, strength, success and sheer, face-splitting joy every single time they make you smile.

(Yeah ... it’s kind of adorable.)

But, the river runs both ways …

… if he’s NOT pleasing you (or even if he just FEELS like he’s not …)

.. then that means he’s going to be pretty unhappy, have doubts about himself, stop feeling good when you’re around, stop loving you so much, stop confiding in you, and generally feel like kind of a FAILURE.

And since guys are simple creatures, and are largely driven by a desire to WIN in life …

… feeling like a failure is kind of the death knell to most men’s ability to feel happy, loved, and give YOU love in return.

(Incidentally, this is also why the average man’s sex drive goes waaaaay down if he gets fired, made redundant, or even just retires – because he just doesn’t feel like a man any more.)

Now, I’ve been a relationship and dating expert for nearly ten years, and I’ll tell you one thing right now:

If a man is in a relationship with a woman who he just can’t make happy any more …

… like if there’s a burden of unmet expectations … or you kind of act contemptuous of him a lot (remember how we just talked about that?) … or he just gets the sense that he’s not succeeding at his primary job of making you HAPPY and giving you PLEASURE …

… then that’s a man who’s primed to cheat.

Because men are driven to FEEL like MEN.

And guess what makes a man FEEL like a man??

Yup: pleasing you.

4. So what the heck do you do now?

So what’s the next step?

Should you break up with him?

Does he still love you?

What’s happening with this other woman? And why would he choose someone ‘uglier’ than you anyway??

(The answer to that last one is super simple, by the way …

… because even an ‘ugly’ woman who can make a man FEEL like a man is going to have WAY more success at getting his heart than a beautiful woman who makes him feel like a failure.)

So here’s my answer (and it’s probably going to annoy the heck out of you) …

It kind of depends.

It depends on a whole bunch of things.

I mean … do you want to be with a man who cheated on you?

What’s your relationship normally like?

Do you make each other happy?

When he walks into the room, does your face split into an adoring smile and that sense of warmth and happiness just rise up inside of you?

Does he make you feel like a woman?

Do you make him feel like a man?

Do you WANT to stay together??

Or do you just find yourself feeling kind of … irritated and disappointed and unloved and uncertain about your feelings for him more often than not??

I can’t answer those questions for you. But I can tell you how to answer them for yourself:

You sit down with your man and you have a really awkward, really honest conversation with him.

You talk about what’s been missing in your relationship over the past months or years that caused this infidelity.

And you talk about it until you can decide, together, what both of you want to do now.

Will cheating break you up?

Maybe. Maybe not. But as a relationship coach, I can tell you that I’ve seen relationships bounce back from an affair and literally improve as a direct result of one or both partners having an affair.

It all comes down to what you say during ‘the conversation’ about cheating itself.

If you want to know EXACTLY what to say to a man to ‘cheat proof’ him against infidelity (and fix things if one or both of you has already strayed), then

8 Simple Words to Fix Infidelity Forever (Even If It’s Already Happened) …

Worried he’ll cheat?

Maybe he already has, and you don’t know what to do?

Maybe YOU were the one who cheated, and you’re terrified you made a huge mistake he’ll never forgive you for?

If so, then go check out this cartoon I put together for you [LINK GOES HERE]

In it, I’ll teach you about the 8 incredibly simple words that are proven to ‘fix’ infidelity forever …

… eight tiny little words that inspire a level of desire and connection in any man and will drag his attention 100% onto YOU (where it belongs.)

Here’s that link again: [INSERT LINK HERE]

With love,

Mirabelle Summers

This article comes to you courtesy of Mirabelle Summers, author of Wrap Him Around Your Finger [LINK HERE] 

If you are serious about changing your success with men, and getting men to do more of the things you WANT him to do...

If you want genuine men who will love you, shower you with attention, and give you the commitment you
deserve...

Discover Mirabelle's secret mind control method and watch some pretty amazing things happen :)

Do it now:

Wrap Him Around Your Finger [LINK HERE]